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Jakarta, 30 Dec 2012
This my post after a long time i'm not post anything.
There are many progress story in my life, but yeah some things still run at same place :)
Mulai dari mana yaa...
Mulai dari jalan di tempat ya?
Hmm, my relationship is unique.
Kurang unik apa coba sama penampilan beda langit.
Satu preman S.Ikom (katanya), satu kayaknya masi cocok jadi anggota Kerohanian Islam.
Yah selain itu, kadang ngerasa si justru penampilan ini yang bikin aku terbatas untuk masuk ke circle dia yg memang ga netral. Even aku tau mungkin circle yang ga netral juga refer to his family too, tapi masuk ke temen-temennya akan lebi sulit. I assume, my appearance would be a threat with some people, and I don't want make my mate's friend not comfortable with me.
Ngena banget ketika dia mulai choose his friend than spending time together. It happened many times.
Bahkan sama temen ceweknya.
Sometimes i feel that he try to push me away. Selama ini aku yang bebal. If he said no, i'll try for next day and then he would say yes to me. I couldn't hear answer No for what i want.
But now.. I feel tired :) maybe this is just temporary feeling. Sometimes i think i need to freeze, not doing anything and hope, he would chase me. And i know that would be a small possibility. Haha, because he have passive act for his default.
At this moment, a black voice tell that, maybe this relationship is mekso :) Maybe he just not match for me. Maybe i act too irrational, but... in the end, i always feel that i'm happy. Even match, but how if i'm not happy?
Yeah, we still need space for each other. Because, yes, i look neutral in here, and that's mean i couldn't with him, always in many moments :(
And when he know that i'm tired, means just silent no news from me or obvious angry, sometimes he would do a nice small thing and give me a full of happy day, and we would back to intense :)
Another story about my ex, aku ga ngerti kenapa dia yang selalu bikin emosi meledak. Agak disayangin si sebenernya, karena lensa kamera, akhirnya berujung pada pemblokan fb, tapi aku sendiri ngeri sama rasa marah yang masi kerasa. Dua taun bareng, akhirnya jadi kayak ga ada ceritanya gt. Ya, aku si ga nyalain dia. Kalo dipikir2, emang gt orangnya. Salah nya kok mau ya
Lalu kerjaan, satu-satu orang fav di kantor resign. Jobdesc pun kerasa mulai gt-gt aja. Ujung-ujungnya dipanggil manajer katanya ga ada passion, keras kepala, dll. Dan uniknya, dia ngomong itu semua based on other report, not from what she saw. Yaa, justru dia cuy yang bikin ga nyaman. Udah gaji kalah sama penjaga pintu TJ, mintanya banyak, ngasinya dikit. Suasana kerja udah ga nyaman. Dan mudah2an Senin ada hasil dari interview. Amiiin~
Apalagi yaa... orang tua mungkin yaa, mama kembali minta aku nyari kerja di Bontang biar deket sama aku, tapi ma... aku lagi ngerintis bisnis, dan lebih banyak channelnya kalo di sini di banding di Bontang :( Aku sendiri juga kangen si tinggal bareng mama lagi :( Kalo lancar, mudah2an papa mau pindah ke Depok setelah pensiun dan bisa ngumpul di Depok jadinya :D
Udah ah segitu aja. Ta-ta
This my post after a long time i'm not post anything.
There are many progress story in my life, but yeah some things still run at same place :)
Mulai dari mana yaa...
Mulai dari jalan di tempat ya?
Hmm, my relationship is unique.
Kurang unik apa coba sama penampilan beda langit.
Satu preman S.Ikom (katanya), satu kayaknya masi cocok jadi anggota Kerohanian Islam.
Yah selain itu, kadang ngerasa si justru penampilan ini yang bikin aku terbatas untuk masuk ke circle dia yg memang ga netral. Even aku tau mungkin circle yang ga netral juga refer to his family too, tapi masuk ke temen-temennya akan lebi sulit. I assume, my appearance would be a threat with some people, and I don't want make my mate's friend not comfortable with me.
Ngena banget ketika dia mulai choose his friend than spending time together. It happened many times.
Bahkan sama temen ceweknya.
Sometimes i feel that he try to push me away. Selama ini aku yang bebal. If he said no, i'll try for next day and then he would say yes to me. I couldn't hear answer No for what i want.
But now.. I feel tired :) maybe this is just temporary feeling. Sometimes i think i need to freeze, not doing anything and hope, he would chase me. And i know that would be a small possibility. Haha, because he have passive act for his default.
At this moment, a black voice tell that, maybe this relationship is mekso :) Maybe he just not match for me. Maybe i act too irrational, but... in the end, i always feel that i'm happy. Even match, but how if i'm not happy?
Yeah, we still need space for each other. Because, yes, i look neutral in here, and that's mean i couldn't with him, always in many moments :(
And when he know that i'm tired, means just silent no news from me or obvious angry, sometimes he would do a nice small thing and give me a full of happy day, and we would back to intense :)
Another story about my ex, aku ga ngerti kenapa dia yang selalu bikin emosi meledak. Agak disayangin si sebenernya, karena lensa kamera, akhirnya berujung pada pemblokan fb, tapi aku sendiri ngeri sama rasa marah yang masi kerasa. Dua taun bareng, akhirnya jadi kayak ga ada ceritanya gt. Ya, aku si ga nyalain dia. Kalo dipikir2, emang gt orangnya. Salah nya kok mau ya
Lalu kerjaan, satu-satu orang fav di kantor resign. Jobdesc pun kerasa mulai gt-gt aja. Ujung-ujungnya dipanggil manajer katanya ga ada passion, keras kepala, dll. Dan uniknya, dia ngomong itu semua based on other report, not from what she saw. Yaa, justru dia cuy yang bikin ga nyaman. Udah gaji kalah sama penjaga pintu TJ, mintanya banyak, ngasinya dikit. Suasana kerja udah ga nyaman. Dan mudah2an Senin ada hasil dari interview. Amiiin~
Apalagi yaa... orang tua mungkin yaa, mama kembali minta aku nyari kerja di Bontang biar deket sama aku, tapi ma... aku lagi ngerintis bisnis, dan lebih banyak channelnya kalo di sini di banding di Bontang :( Aku sendiri juga kangen si tinggal bareng mama lagi :( Kalo lancar, mudah2an papa mau pindah ke Depok setelah pensiun dan bisa ngumpul di Depok jadinya :D
Udah ah segitu aja. Ta-ta
